I need new boots...

So I was out hiking with a friend yesterday. Note to self: steel-toed boots get caught in crevices in the rocks REALLY EASILY. My toe got caught; my body kept going; the whole system bent at the ankle & I was screaming in pain before I hit the ground. It took me several tries to get up w/out passing out. Yikes! Fortunately, I had ibuprofin, and an awesome walking stick, and a cell phone so I could let my family know what was going on. I finally managed to get to my feet and discovered a way of limping along that did not bend the ankle. Unfortunately, I was 3 miles from the trailhead. So I kept limping. Part of the way along, we returned to the area managed by the visitor's center. They run tours on these little paved roads. My wife, who had raced across town to the visitor's center as soon as she heard I was injured, tried to convince a ranger to go up the little paved road and meet me and drive me back, thus saving me 2 miles. But that was a no go. They "don't do" that kind of thing. If I wanted a ride, I'd have to call 911. Well, I figured, if I'm walking all right (albeit very slowly & painfully), that hardly counts as an emergency. Besides, ambulances are expensive and I really don't think my insurance covers emergency calls. (And yes, although they can't exactly charge you for the call itself, they sure as heck can charge for the 2-mile ride in the ambulance from the trailhead to the visitor's center.) So I kept limping. It took me 2 hours. I am exhausted. We then went to urgent care, because by now the ankle was swollen & kind of numb, and I still couldn't bend it. They x-rayed it & determined there was no break, but it was a nasty sprain. Joy!

The truly disturbing things in life...

I parked in an ordinary parking space on an ordinary day. Next to the car was a raised gravel area with a sad, wintry bush and some dried leaves. And what appeared to be a rag. I didn't think much about it, but simply left the vehicle to complete my business.

When I returned, I took a closer look at the rag. Not for any great reason, or because it was remarkable at first glance, but because my back has been stiff so it took a little longer than usual to sit down, and I had to look at something.

The rag was not a rag. It was a corset. A black corset, inside out, with stiff stays and laces, just sitting in the parking lot.

I found myself contemplating the erstwhile owner of the limp corset. Was she a dominatrix type, who carries around a spare corset the way some people carry around a spare bra, just in case of emergency, who was not careful about how she opened the door of her car? Was she a normal sort of girl embarrassed about owning such a thing, who found a need (perhaps in a parental visit) to quickly discard the item? Was she out on a date and found the bank parking lot ideal shelter for 'adult activities'?

I mean, really, who loses a CORSET? The things are expensive!